#only 3.5 years in the making lmfao

[kyluxtrashpit]

And since today is my 7 year kylux-versary, I’m going to give the first tease of my upcoming (likely to be) final kylux fic

12 chapters, estimated final wordcount at over 50k, started in December 2019, and today I’m excited to show you a moodboard and reveal the title. Stay tuned for more teases as it gets closer to completion!

[fff777]

Watched the Jisung Johnny NCT2020 livestream

Jisung saying he had to act nervous for the bit

Johnny thought Deja Vu track video was cool but Chewing Gum was recommended on the side lol

Doyoung passing by and playing music

You know, there's a 7 year difference between them...that's a pretty big age gap :P

Johnny threatening to spoil and Jisung being like T_T don't pls

There are 50 minutes until Misfit is released

I think Johnny thinks it's cute that Jisung got really flustered about possibly spoiling the song

Jisung's hair troubles

Jisung: ...This is awkward... My guy everything is awkward to you

Doyoung messaged Jisung to get burgers after >P

Johnny trying to get Jisung to pronounce English words with an American accent

Looks like they're promoting a poll? The version that Jisung is on is only a beta version of the poll though lol

Jisung stopping Johnny from playing the B-sides even though they've already been released. I think Jisung is just really easily cringed out lol.

Jisung left to style his hair XD

Jisung and Johnny did film awsaz, but they weren't paired together lol.

Lol Jisung finds Johnny unpredictable and found it difficult to handle on awsaz

Jisung said that Jaemin is normal 2 days of the week but Jisung is normal 6 days of the week.

Johnny: What about today? Jisung: I am so normal today

Johnny interrogating Jisung about what he's like when he's not normal. Jisung said that he was like Jaemin but Johnny said that he doesn't really know what that entails lol.

Jisung said that Jaemin was normal on the awsaz day though.

Jisung said that when your part in a song is short, usually around an hour is allotted for you, but if your part is long, then around two hours is allotted. I didn't realize recording took that long ToT

So apparently Renjun took 3.5 hours to record and it shifted everyone's schedule ToT

Johnny was on a NCT Dream binge XD

LMFAO Johnny searching for NCT Dream and seeing the fanmade videos instead of NCT Dream's Youtube account

Johnny reacts to Deja Vu >3

You know, I didn't feel much for Deja Vu at first, but now it's pretty hype

Johnny commenting on how Chenle and Jisung were so baby in Chewing Gum and now they've grown up <3

Cringing when Johnny's watching his part

For Highway to Heaven, NCT 127 filmed at two locations but only footage of one location was used ^^;; all that wasted footage I guess.

Jisung asked Johnny for his favourite song and Johnny said We Go Up and Jisung was so pleased even though he was just asking for Johnny's favourite song from NCT2020

It looks like Johnny does forget words in Korean sometimes, but it seems to me that he likes to be precise with his words so that's why he's always thinking of the right one.

Jisung likes Misfit and Make a Wish

Jisung accidentally spoiling the name of Work It??? Boy is so stressed lol. Johnny tried to save it like "it's just the name of the demo version!" It was not lmfao.

Doyoung worked out to Misfit

Doyoung talking about how the songs can be categorized into past, present, and future, and Jisung and Johnny being like "he sounds like a teacher"

Johnny testing Jisung on his simple math X'D

Everybody at 127 dorm wants to give ice cream to Jisung lol

[optimizedcuriosity]

Workforce Paradox : Corporate "Loyalty" and Employee Disillusionment.

- When "We're Like Family" Means Unpaid Overtime -

Hey there, fellow corporate survivors! 👋 Let's dive into the wild world of workplace loyalty, where companies expect us to bleed their brand colors while we're just trying to make ends meet. Buckle up, because this rollercoaster of corporate expectations vs. reality is bumpier than your manager's attempt at "casual Friday." The Loyalty Demand: A One-Way Street?

Picture this: companies are out here acting like they want a long-term commitment, but we're not feeling the love. A 2023 PwC survey found that 61% of executives believe customers (employees?) are more loyal now than before the pandemic, and 70% of employers are budgeting for pay to remain the same or higher in 2024. Spoiler alert: this is not the way...and we definitely aren't here for it.

The Employee Reality Check

While the higher-ups are feeling optimistic, here's what's really going down:

Only 20% of consumers agree that loyalty has increased since the pandemic (Shocking, right? Who really wants to buy from people that don't support...well...people.)

A whopping 92% of employers are preparing for layoffs in 2024. (Nothing says "we value you" like job insecurity.) (Also a life update and congratulations to me for being a part of a round of layoffs. I was thinking I was underpaid already, but boy does the reality get worse without the job...)

The average salary increase for 2024 is a modest 4%, down from 4.4% in 2023. (Inflation who? Also, that more than what they gave me last year. I got 3% lmfao)

Why We're All Feeling a Bit... Meh

1. Stagnant Wages: The Never-Ending Budget Dance

Remember when we thought we'd be living large by now? The wage gap between actual earnings and what we should be making (based on a 3.5% growth since 2007) is $2.38 per hour as of July 2024. That's not exactly living the dream, is it? Don't even get me started on being sold an education path to getting to this point.

2. Mass Layoffs: The Corporate Shuffle

2022 was the year of "restructuring" – right out the door. Major players like Meta, Amazon, and Twitter showed us the true meaning of "it's not you, it's me" with significant layoffs. And 45% of employers are blaming "economic uncertainty" for tightening those purse strings.

3. Corporate Greed: The Ultimate Glow-Up

While we're watching our pennies, CEO pay has grown a casual 940% since 1978. Worker compensation? A modest 12% increase. Talk about a growth disparity.

The Culture Con: Promises vs. Reality

Companies love to dangle the "amazing culture" carrot. They promise:

Work-life balance (but expect you to answer emails at all hours and unlimited PTO that isn't actually unlimited or PTO.)

Diversity and inclusion (look, we have a ping pong table!)

Employee recognition (here's a gift card for your 5-year anniversary)

Open communication (please fill out this anonymous survey but somehow your manager knows you're the only one to not answer.)

Corporate social responsibility (we tweeted about Earth Day!)

But let's be real, 74% of employees see the link between culture and customer service, yet only 19% strongly agree their manager explains how company values affect their work. It's like they're speaking corporate, but we only understand human.

The Benefits Bait-and-Switch

Companies are trying to win us over with benefits, but they're not quite hitting the mark. The OneDigital Employee Value Perception Study spilled the tea:

56% of us are one surprise bill away from financial panic ( I have a month at best)

25% are eyeing their 401k like it's an emergency fund (that give me 2 months)

35% are practically begging for financial guidance (or just better pay?)

Yet here we are, getting "free" coffee instead of financial planning. Thanks, I guess?

The Loyalty Lowdown

All this corporate disconnect is taking its toll:

Only 20% of us are passionate about our jobs. (The other 80% are passionate about... well, not work.)

57% of Gen Z Americans are less loyal to brands now than pre-pandemic. (Can you blame them?)

Only 53% of consumers even bother with loyalty programs. (Points for what, exactly?)

Bridging the Gap: A Novel Concept

So, how do we fix this mess? Here's a wild idea: companies could try... actually caring?

Fair Pay: Because exposure doesn't pay the bills and your executives are too busy chasing corporate clout.

Transparency: Less corporate speak, more honesty.

Real Development: Not just another online certificate.

Authentic Culture: If I hear "we're like family" one more time...

Financial Support: Because adulting is hard and expensive.

Wrapping It Up

Look, the corporate loyalty paradox is real, and it's messier than we'd like to admit. Companies need to wake up and smell the coffee: loyalty is a two-way street. It's time to put their money where their mouth is and create workplaces that don't make us want to update our resumes every other week. We only remember those that actually walk the talk, not just run their mouths. Remember, we're not asking for the moon here – just a fair shake, some genuine appreciation, and maybe a salary that keeps up with inflation. Is that too much to ask? (Spoiler: it's not.) Stay strong out there, corporate warriors. May your coffee be strong and your meetings be short. Sources:

[1] https://insightssuccess.com/measuring-the-success-of-your-company-culture-metrics-and-tools/

[2] https://inmoment.com/blog/the-importance-of-employee-loyalty/

[3] https://www.davron.net/how-benefits-and-company-culture-can-attract-and-retain-top-talent/

[4] https://ftexecutive.com.au/creating-a-workplace-culture-that-fosters-employee-loyalty/

[5] https://www.frontiersin.org/journals/psychology/articles/10.3389/fpsyg.2022.971569/full

[6] https://teamstage.io/employee-loyalty-statistics/

[7] https://www.gallup.com/workplace/327371/how-to-build-better-company-culture.aspx

[8] https://www.onedigital.com/blog/employee-value-perception-study-underlines-benefits-satisfaction-gap-at-various-life-stages/

[bisluthq]

Did your parents know you were 16 the first time and were they okay with it? I’m sure they know now but like did they know back then at the time you were 16 that you had sex? Parents usually don’t want their kids to be sexually active while they are still kids so just curious.

My dad didn’t know and I’ve never told him so I don't know what he thinks lol. My bf and I were together for 3.5 years - 16 to 20 - so like my dad obviously knows I had sex somewhere in that time period lmfao because he’s not an idiot and I was clearly not saving myself for marriage and since I was in a 3.5 year relationship like I didn’t go into age 20 a virgin lmfao like king can deduce what happened there without being Sherlock fucking Holmes. We have never talked about that sex tho even in the vaguest terms. My dad also seemed to think we’d get married tbh like he was very shocked when we broke up. He thought we were a very good match. So yeah I think he knew we were banging but he didn’t want to think about it and still doesn’t. He and I are like up for discussing hot bitches right, and whether or not we’re sexually satisfied at present, not how or where I lost my virginity.

my mum thought it happened earlier than it did actually. I told her when we did it because I wanted like full disclosure and the deal was we weren’t allowed sleepovers until we finished school (our mums decided that) but we were allowed round at one another’s and like I know my mum’s cool so I just told her like “if we use condoms and he leaves afterwards is it cool if we can lock my door so no one bursts in” and she was like “if you use condoms and take your BC absolutely but yeah no he won’t stay over until you finish school”. She was kinda surprised I was asking, because she’d thought we were already finding ways to fuck but as I say we waited for it to be special.

FWIW my parents also started dating aged 16 and definitely didn’t save themselves for marriage and she was my dad’s second like he had screwed this older girl a few months before that lol which is why I don’t think 16 seemed too young to them and possibly why my dad thought my bf and I would get married lol because they did (they also then got badly divorced but that’s another episode in the Nat family saga). My bf’s mum was also v cool and after we finished school was super chill with me staying there - I moved out after I was done with school; he lived at home for most of our relationship (I think he moved out a month or two before we broke up) and she was cool with me being there for like days at a time lol and him being at mine for days at a time. The only rule had been finishing school and she said he can’t have a double bed in his room but if we can make it work and are using protection she dgaf.

[jessmenace]

Taylor Rave @ Avalon Hollywood 04/08/23

themed "raves" have been all the rage this past year - with the success of Shrek Rave, Broadway Rave, 90s Rave, etc... and the creators of the Taylor Swift-themed raves traveling the country are just one of the many to join the lineup.

so when my best friend's younger sister invited me to check out their LA stop, I wasn't sure exactly what to expect. both of us have been huge Taylor fans since day 1 (I actually caught the Fearless tour with her back in 2009)!

honestly? the concept - genius. Taylor has a HUGE discography (including hella electronic remixes already) which makes it easy for any corporate DJ to mix without much thought. but despite that, the DJs in question actually did create a lot of the remixes played that night themselves! including some deep. ass. cuts. I was pretty impressed with the depth of their Taylor knowledge. for two men in their late 20's, they played out shit like Picture to Burn (OG fans only!) to Paris (bonus track!); an Avicii/Taylor mashup to a Red remix in "the style of Fred Again" (their words, not mine.. but still pretty impressive in concept).

(the DJs were also genius in picking Tay Tay, knowing the audience it's bound to attract. this was proven when I saw them play out All Too Well 10 minute version and spent all of those 10 mins flirting with the 5 giggling, cute blonde girls they brought into the DJ booth lmfao.)

all in all, the night felt like a 3.5 hourlong (!!) night of a huge karaoke party with the girls and the gays, all covered in glitter and scream/crying Taylor's best lyrics from debut to Midnights at the top of our lungs. Avalon, with its carpeted interior and juvenile balloons, kind of made it feel lowkey like a convention mixer and less like a rave... but that's kind of what I expect from a Taylor Swift themed event anyways. it was a shit ton of fun, for what it is. Overall, the night was: 9/10! ♥

[cigaretteparfum]

this is ... i think my fourth or fifth offer? and in terms of pay ngl it's the lowest of all the other but also in terms of everything else it's better.

mophead muses aloud about her prospects after read more for mutuals only!!!

basically my first interview was a scam (lol) (that's a third) (that's gotta be the last, right?). then i got two calls for MT position but the first was for sales marketing and i legit don't think i can do that. that was the one with the highest pay offer (3m starting point; 3.5 if i qualify for the management training programme), full benefits, and even sales bonus starting from the first month (all the other offers only give the bonus after the second or third month which. okay, not exactly an issue but like there's this one). buuuutt it's pretty far from home, boarding house desert, and i'd have to work with sales target which is the part where i was like, "uhhh" lol. the other MT position is technically also in sales but without a set target. it's even farther than the other one though, half minimum wage starting point, longer training period, and fifteen hours work day.

(if i haven't gotten a job when/if they call me for a second interview i'll accept it though adlkfjskfj)

i already rejected the sales marketing and i kinda don't regret it kinda do?? the money's definitely the part that makes me kinda regret it (only one to a half million below minimum wage!!!) but when i saw how the TL worked, thought about how that would be me, and the sales target i'd have to meet ... aye, don't really regret it anymore lol.

compared to that, the MT programme that doesn't rely on sales, while far away and already exhausts me just hearing about it, offers a pretty safe and guaranteed career prospect ngl. unlike the other one that advertised itself as MT but then was like, "weeell, you may qualify and you may not, and if you don't you'll be stuck in this sales position" this one was, "yeah, you are being trained for management" with clear timeline as well: 1 month training period, 6 months as spg, 2 years as spv, then manager.

realistically it may not map out as cleanly, buuutt at least it gives a better sense of like, how long i'll need to stick to it, y'know? and if i were to quit, i can just be like, "well how far have i've gone in completing this timeline." like if i were to stay with the company for even a year, i prolly would already have some time however short being a supervisor which, let's be real, would look a lot better in my future resumé than just. sales.

also it's just easier to find boarding houses or even rent a whole house around the area. additional expenses, but it's prolly better to pay 8 to 10 million each year for housing (definitely easily less than that with boarding houses) rather than paying 1.2 million each month for transport alone, lmfao.

then there's the bar. 6+1 work days, 8 to 10 hours of work, 2 million salary plus daily bonus, but the location is pretty sus at night. that was my prime candidate before i scored the interview i had today, though. since schools and uni are also abound, it prolly won't be too hard to find affordable boarding house. and the sus part was mostly just this one road anw, so if i can avoid that route then i'll prolly be fine. maybe.

also like, ik being a service worker is hard and even moreso when you'll be dealing with drunk people but. oh my god i've been stuck working alone for over five years i literally have no friends i can hang out with am so fucking done being alone i'll literally take any job if it means frequent human interaction PLEASE.

then there's this last one i just finished the interview for! fucking one point five million salary! that's less than half the minimum wage! but it's super close. 👁️👁️ like it's so close if i feel like walking i can get there in less than an hour. 👁️👁️ 7 to 9 hours of work depending on shift. 👁️👁️ and i know this district well enough that even going home after midnight is whatever, done that plenty of times already lol.

lowest salary, no clear future prospects, but i am most drawn to this one. legitimately, if they do contact me to begin my training right away, i will accept. like, whatever, i was only paid 300k less for my previous role and we managed. worst case scenario, just stick to it for like, a year. i'd definitely have a better chance in the future if i can put something better in my resumé. who cares. the economy is hard, lol.

my dad is definitely not going to be happy, though. he's persistent about me deserving sooo much better which, 1) true and 2) that's so sweet. but as much as i love the man, he really doesn't know what it feels like to be my position and he's yet to understand that as much as i love doing creative work, am not really into turning my hobbies into job. so. there's that.

welp!!!

am off!!! wml!!!

[miekasa]

any dad!levi hcs for father’s day today🥺🤲🏽

Absolutely!! I’ll do this I guess using the kids I have for him in my parent au? If you’ve read that, you know about Holden, but there are two more so prepare to meet them :’) happy father’s day to Levi <33

To begin with, you guys would plan to have your kids (to the best of your abilities; you were intentionally trying to have kids at a time when you both knew you were ready for them. 

Although accidents to do happen, and Levi would welcome an unplanned child all the same; that being said, if you’re both want a family, you would have discussed it beforehand (which is to a degree, is a lot about mental preparation for himself). 

In his perfect world, he’d have two daughters. They’d be equal parts him and you, and they’d be quiet and curious and lovely and life would be good. He’d spend his days with you and his two tiny daughters, raising his little family and doing all he could for his favorite girls. 

So, naturally, he does get two daughters, but also a son in between; and the latter two kids are far from easy in their own unique ways lmfao 

You might have already met Holden, and she’s the oldest in my dad Levi au, and the most like him. Levi’s dark hair, his grey eyes, his overall unimpressed visage, his knack for cleanliness and organization—down to the way she holds her sippy cups, she’s damn near Levi’s doppleganger. 

Holden is somewhere between 3.5-4 years old before you have your second kid, and in that time is when Levi confirms he thinks he was cut out to be a certified Girl Dad. 

Both Levi and Holden take quality father-daughter time very seriously. It’s impossible to change plans once they’re set: “Daddy, you promised we would go to the famer’s market on Sunday. You pinky promised.” And Levi wouldn’t dare break a pinky promise, so he makes time for it. 

Levi doesn’t play favorites with his kids, but there is something special about Holden as his first born. He’s constantly in awe of just how much she resembles him. Four years into raising her and it’s still hard to wrap his head around. 

Much to his chagrin, Hange and Eren are Holden’s favorite adults. Maybe Levi understands the admiration for Hange, but Eren... come on, Holden, you’re breaking his heart at that point. 

It’s almost out of character for your daughter to be so openly affectionate about someone outside of your immediate family, but she really loves having Eren as a babysitter; and you know she’s playing favorites, because she remains neutral on Armin, even though he and Eren always babysit as a duo. 

She doesn’t have a favorite grandparent, but Kenny spoils her the most. Levi tells him he shouldn’t, but when has Kenny ever listened to Levi. The man isn’t a fan of kids, but he thinks yours and Levi’s are pretty cool, and Holden is about the coolest 4 year old he could ever meet. 

When she was learning to walk, Levi’s favorite thing was holding her little hand and guiding her around. Even now, when she can stand perfectly fine on her own two feet, Levi loves it when she reaches for his hand; Holden is a pretty independent kid, even at 4 years old, so Levi never takes affection from her for granted. 

They’re best friends and Holden goes everywhere with him. Their favorite father-daughter activity is going to the grocery store, and Levi lets Holden point to and assess her favorite fruits and veggies while she sits happily in the shopping cart. 

Sometimes there are other parents struggling with a kid throwing a temper tantrum. Levi simply clicks his teeth, while Holden shakes her little head. “That’s pretty embarassing, daddy,” she says, looking at the poor parent with an unamused glare that rivals Levi’s. He nods and pushes the cart past the scene, “Tell me about it, kid.” 

Your second kid is a boy, and he looks more like you than Levi, but manages to have Levi’s signature hair color and pout when things aren’t going his way.

He comes as a shock to both you and Levi, because after your ultrasound, you were told you were having another girl. Turns out, they’d accidentally mixed up your files, and you were having a boy instead, which you do not find out until your mid-term check up a few months later. Cue Levi buffering like an old computer. 

Kiaan is welcomed all the same, even tho Levi is still in disbelief; he was mentally preparing to have another daughter on his hands. He puts more pressure on himself with his son; not that he wasn’t trying his best to be a parent to Holden, but any insecurities he might have about being a good come out when your son is born, because Levi has no “man of the house” example to follow from. 

You reassure him that your son will turn out to be just fine, and raising him the way you raised Holden, and would have raised another daughter is perfectly acceptable. Of course Levi rises to the occasion after the initial shock; he’s determined to be the dad to his son that he never had. 

Where Holden is more reserved, Kiaan likes to talk and babble about anything whenever and wherever he can, to whoever is around. It’s not uncommon for you or Levi to find your son completely entertained by telling a story out loud to himself while playing with his toys.

Loves to rope Levi into making his toys interact and have “conversations” with each other, and Kiaan genuinely thinks his dad is hilarious, even if he doesn’t completely understand what he’s saying. It always makes Levi smile to hear Kiaan try and copy the bass and tone of his voice when he’s mocking him. 

Kiaan loves messing with his dad, and Levi’s all talk, so of course he lets him. He’ll be on a Zoom meeting for work, and Kiaan will be sat in his lap, running little toy cars across the desk in front of him, or tugging on Levi’s hair, and Levi just lets him. It makes quite the cute sight, and Hange has definitely taken a few screen recordings. 

That being said, your son is more of a mama’s boy than anything. Kiaan loves messing with Levi, but if you’re in the room, there’s a 95% chance he’ll be on your lap or at your side shadowing whatever you’re doing. 

Kiaan is a universal copycat tho, so whatever you, Levi, or Holden say or do, he tries for himself. This makes him especially susceptible to repeating Levi’s foul language and bad habits than Holden. (“Kiaan, you can’t sleep on the chair, it’s not good for your back.” “But daddy sleeps on the chairs sometimes!” “...Alright kid, you got me there.”) 

He’s a very loving kid with his words, too, always thanking people and proclaiming his love, so he doesn’t exactly have a “favorite” adult or babysitter, but he does get particularly excited when Erwin or Farlan come around. He feels especially tall when Erwin lets him sit on his shoulders, and Farlan always entertains his story-telling. 

He’s a sucker for his grandma though, and gives Kuchel a million kisses whenever she comes around. Does not let go over her for the entire time she’s over at your house, and will sit on her lap throughout dinner. 

The most affectionate child, so where Holden only likes holding hands, Kiaan loves cuddling with you and Levi, and likes to be held whenever possible. Levi spoils him a little too much, and more often than not, if you’re walking outside for more than two hours, Kiaan will end up on Levi’s shoulders or in your arms. 

Your last kid is another girl, and, yeah she’s just a baby no older than a few months, but Levi can’t help but think she’s especially tiny, and he can’t help but to look at her and hold her whenever possible. Your baby girl also leaves Levi a little dumbstruck because she manages to look like a combination of you and his mother. 

As she grows, it becomes apparent that you’ve got another daddy’s girl on your hands. Doesn’t matter if you’re literally breast feeding her, Aria will throw a tantrum if she’s separated from Levi for more than an hour. 

The good news is, her sleep cycle is as irregular as Levi’s, so he’s got someone to keep him company when everyone else has gone to bed for the evening. Unfortunately, this also means Aria naps a lot during the day, which leaves Levi a little bored since Holden is old enough to be in school full-time, and Kiaan is gone for at least a portion of the day. 

So, he would never tell you, but sometimes he wakes Aria up from her naps just a little bit early to spend more time with her (and cure his boredom). Having an infant trying to grab at his hair with her ravioli sized baby fists while he tries to cook lunch certainly makes the task more difficult, but it also adds welcomed color to his day.

You and Levi have to hold Aria constantly when she’s awake or else she’ll cry (although, if you leave her in the arms of her siblings, she does settle down, too); that, or she’ll find her tiny baby hands somewhere they shouldn’t be. Like dipped in a jar of strawberry jam. Or peanut butter. Or both. 

Levi talks to his kids like he would any other adult, so it’s not uncommon to find him brewing tea with a baby strapped to his chest, narrating the steps to good tea-making out loud to her for her to hear. He swears she can understand him, and he attributes Holden and Kiaan’s growing vocabularies, and the early ages at which they started speaking to this. 

Aria will be in her little chest strap thing while Levi’s cooking dinner, and he’ll look down at her like, “Alright, we’re gonna julienne your carrots today. Yesterday we cubed them, but you’ve got grabby hands, so this will give you more room to work with.”

Kiaan loves holding Aria and honestly just being around her, and you and Levi think it’s adorable how he loves to play with her, and how he knows to be gentle with her. He shares a room with her, and loves sharing his bedtime story times, so you or Levi will read them to sleep together. 

Holden isn’t crazy about babies, but she’s a good older sister, and Aria seems to be obsessed with her. She crawls and scoots towards her if given the opportunity, and Holden will always look to you or Levi before attempting to hold or lift her up, as if asking permission. She’ll pat Aria’s head to get her to stop crying, or let her play with her hands. 

Levi thinks one of the best parts about being a dad is seeing the different dynamics and relationships between your kids. Holden isn’t most physically or verbally affectionate, but she’s still compassionate, and Kiaan looks up to her; and Kiaan is the perfect middle ground, knowing when it’s appropriate to bother (affectionate) Holden, and when to give her space, and curiously hovers around his baby sister, too. 

[ofmermaidstories]

ooh...what books would you recommend then? i'm really curious what your taste is like

i should preface this with disclosing that i actually enjoyed Lapvona LMFAO. like, after i posted about it on here, i sat down and finished the whole thing in one go. 🫖 i gave it a 3.5 ⭐️ on literal!!!

actually, enjoyed isn’t the right word, but it is the simplest—i just didn’t hate it. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ i didn’t hate it, and at times i thought i could see what ottessa was trying to do, but it’s just—it’s grotesque. like, every now and then i thought we were getting to the heart of some allegory for our modern day society (people suffering under the whims of the 1% who could literally make everyone’s life easier if they wanted to, but they don’t, bc they only care about themselves), but then Ottessa would emphasise that with the main character (who’s like, 13? 14?) having to rub grapes on his butthole (i am absolutely taming this down btw) and feed them to the servant girl (also 14), so. 🥹 it’s—yeah. 🥹 that is literally probably one of the mildest things about this book that i can mention and in the text it’s a humiliating, awful thing, but it’s still there. and throughout the whole book, the (very many) awful things are like that: there in vivid detail. and that’s why i say i would never recommend it—because it’s very much a story that people need to go into with their eyes wide-open for!!! i like ottessa’s writing, and it’s because of that and little quotes throughout the book that i can say “i liked this”—but i can’t guarantee that for anyone else, and i refuse to be responsible for someone’s choice to read it LOL.

there’s a quote I can’t stop thinking of from an interview that Ottessa gave her now-husband, Luke Goebel, which sort of perfectly encapsulates Ottessa’s writing in general—and is good foreshadowing for how that comes to a head in Lapvona.

People ask me why I find that stuff so interesting. Well, it is interesting. Disgust is an interesting response. It’s funny.

— Ottessa Moshfegh, Vanity is the Enemy: an interview with Ottessa Moshfegh, 2017

i could absolutely see Pandemic-Era Ottessa trapped at home writing Lapvona bc she finds it funny. 😭 like the immature Lord in the book, who finds it funny to watch a servant girl be fed butthole grapes. 😭 if i had to describe the book, it’s like… it’s like you’ve been invited to a dinner party, and you walk in, and someone is playing some self-proclaimed snuff film on one projector and Monty Python and the Holy Grail on another, overlapping, while they tell The Aristocrats to a room full of other guests who have nothing but rotting roast meat on their plates. that’s what the book is like.

— Lapvona, page 22 (ebook version)

i can’t believe i talked so long about a book i literally said i would never recommend. 😭 i just have a lot of feelings about it leave me alone reeeeee. but ok let’s talk about books i’m currently reading that i would recommend, tho:

i’ve just started The Dragon Republic by R.F. Kuang! The Poppy War series has been fun!! i saw people make a lot of fuss about the violence in TPW but Rebecca’s writing style is quite… detached/she tells not shows through the entire book, so i do think that kind of deadens the horror (or it did for me, LOL, but considering what i just said about the bullshit in Lapvona, maybe don’t trust me). i liked it enough to finish the first book though and then go out and buy the next two, so i’d recommend it to anyone who likes war-time fantasies!!! bc war is a big aspect of the books so far, and tbh i presume the trilogy as a whole.

my copy of The Monster of Florence by Douglas Preston and Mario Spezi came today—i have literally wanted to read it for YEARS. it’d probably be a good read for anyone that likes investigative true crime. thomas harris apparently took inspo for hannibal from the Monster! which is actually how i learnt about this book—through the hannibal tv fandom lmfao. specifically the quote that actually put this book on my to-read-list has nothing to do with the murders its about, but is instead this:

Florentines are a famously closed people, considered by other Italians to be stiff, haughty, class-conscious, excessively formal, backward-looking, and fossilized by tradition[...] Deep inside, Florentines know they are more civilized than other Italians. They gave the world all that is fine and beautiful and they have done enough. Now they can shut their doors and turn inward, answerable to nobody.

Answerable to nobody…. urk. i lose my shit over the idea of enclosed societies. especially snobby-ass ones. imagine trying to break into society like that…. incredible, LOL. i’ll report back on if our intrepid american writer manages to do so (spoilers: he don’t, LOL).

okay okay what else. i’ve also got my grubby little mitts on a copy of The Book of Goose by Yiyun Li. it’s quite lovely so far! it’s about two french girls, best friends, and kind of how they seperate. in the same vein (female friendship throughout a lifetime) i’ve also recently gotten a copy of My Brilliant Friend by Elena Ferrante, so I’m excited to rip into that.

recently i finished Kitchen by Banana Yoshimoto—that was lovely. 🥺 I’ve been wanting to read it for a year or so, now, and it was so so worth it! I cried several times lmfao (but that might also be bc it and the short story with it hit a very specific set of emotional triggers for me LOL). now that we’re talking Japanese authors—earlier this year I read Strange Weather in Tokyo by Hiromi Kawakami and that was a lovely little book, too. i also want to read my copy of Lonely Castle in the Mirror by Mizuki Tsujimura before the year ends!!!

on the autobiographical scale, i literally have a copy of Jennette McCurdy’s I’m Glad My Mom Died next to my bed (i have a tower of books next to my bed actually sdlkfjsdlkfj i need to get some bookshelves 😭). i absolutely bought into the hype with it but i think it was worth it. 🥺 not an easy book, though!

this post probably makes me sound more of a reader than i actually am lmfao. im not. most of my reading is fanfiction (derogatory). 🥹

[mobiused]

Kim Lip saying this is making me so sad :( I can’t believe the girls don’t know how famous they are https://twitter.com/lunatictheworld/status/1467411420308733958?s=21

I was watching videos of old concerts live loonaverse etc and the screaming venue and realised they literally havent experienced a cheering audience in well over 2 years... The girls mentioned how they get their energy to do the intense choreos from the crowd, but for the last 3.5 comebacks they've only performed to camera crews. They have no tangible way of feeling their growth, and if anything I'm pretty sure they feel as though their popularity has regressed, because when they go to fansigns of course it's going to be scarce 😭

Hyeju mentioned she went to her birthday cafe and was really confused because it was empty, and not even the organisers were there (the 5 of them coincidentally went to the cafe Hyeju posted about on Twitter about for her birthday RIGHT when she visited their event LMFAO it was so funny seeing their meltdown on the tl), but the macarons were almost sold out (and there were like... easily a hundred), so she thought the cafe had tanked at first, and she was unpopular, before she realised about the macarons :( And of course they still have memories of LOONAcon, which they speak about all the time of being one of the highlights of their career but it's not the same as success in your home country I don't think 🤕🤕 Icb they still think theyre nugu :(

[dreaming-of-assclass]

AssClass OC

*SOBS* SHE’S FINALLY DONE!! 😭

Trying to replicate the Lerche style was...painful and took forever lmao

I’m just gonna info-dump a lot about her under the cut! Honestly less than half of this is relevant, but I figured I’d include as much as I can so you can get to know her.

I’m not making a fanfic for her or anything: but she will pop up a lot in mini drabbles, art pieces, etc.

Kamiya Mai (神谷舞) - Possessing charisma and a knack for navigating around any type of terrain; Class E’s Investigator

“Bravery doesn’t come from nowhere. You have to be scared first to have courage.”

Description

One of the class moodmakers, Mai is fun, witty, and cares deeply for her peers. She puts her all into everything she does and isn’t afraid to stand up for others.

She has an extremely strong photogenic memory and a natural knack for exploring new places, gathering information and memorizing routes with ease.

She’s a skilled athlete as well, very quick, agile and able to use it to her advantage in assassinations.

Codename: Honeybee (ミツバチ/Mitsubachi), Sugino’s Idea

He’s been struck with disbelief after having breakfast at her house once and finding out she puts honey on her pancakes instead of syrup. Also the name is fitting overall, as her short temper and cute looks remind him of a honeybee.

Birthday: April 2nd

Height: 155 cm

Weight: 51 kg

Bust Size: C

Blood Type: B

Favorite Subjects: Art, Biology, History

Worst Subjects: Classical and Modern Japanese, Math

Interests and Special Skills: Skateboarding and exploring new places

Former Club: Calligraphy Club

Treasured Items: Her hat collection and art journal

Favorite Food: Iced Coffee

Bento or Snacks: Snacks

___________________________

Stats

Physical Ability: 4

Mobility: 4.5

Close-Range Assassination: 4

Long-Range Assassination: 2

Academic Prowess: 3.5

Characteristic Skill (Spy-in-Training): 4

___________

Karasuma’s Assassination Aptitude

Strategy/Planning: 2

Commanding/Leadership: 3

Execution (ability to carry out plans): 4

Technique (traps, weapons, preparations, etc): 1

Scouting/Intelligence Gathering: 6

Politics/Negotiations: 5

____________

Bitch-sensei’s Fashion Check

Mai has a very tomboyish, soft grunge style. She seems to be equally fond of pants and skirts, although prefers the former for the sake of mobility. Overall her style is street-savvy, and she’s most fond of pink, white, black, red, and gray tones.

School Uniform

With summer being the exception, Mai wears thigh-high black stockings with her uniform. She wears the uniform with little change besides that. Mai changes her hair up very often, but some common styles are space buns, pigtails, or half-up. She’s quite fond of hair clips and wear them everyday.

Street Clothes

Mai wears hats very often, and it drives me crazy. Why cover up that cute face of hers all the time?? She’s very fond of Doc Martens, and usually pairs those with leggings. On her girlier side, skater skirts are a good look for her. And paired with whatever, she seems to really like hoodies.

______________

Relationships

(All of these have so much depth, I’m gonna have to make a separate post o_o)

- Sugino Tomohito (addressed as Tomohito)

He was the first friend she made once she joined Kunugigaoka. They’re best friends and stick to each other often. She greatly supported him during the baseball game against the main campus, to the point that she joined it herself to keep an eye on him.

- Okano Hinata (addressed as Hinata or Lesser Hina)

They hit it off instantly, but upon learning they shared the same birthday, Mai joyfully declared them sisters. They’re very close and bond over a lot, especially sports and thrill-seeking. They can clash at times with their similar temperaments.

- Kanzaki Yukiko (addressed as Yukiko)

Their relationship had a very rocky start. Neither of them liked each other and had very differing natures. It wasn’t until the Kyoto Trip that they began to understand each other. After that, their friendship steadily grew and they became very close. They balance each other as opposites.

- Asano Gakushuu (addressed as Asano or President-kun)

After the first semester mid-term exams, Mai’s family decided to request tutoring for her, so her grades could stay fine/rise. Who else was assigned to her but Asano Gakushuu? It’s a challenge keeping 3-E a secret, but Mai enjoys teasing him and having conversations about anything. And Gakushuu won’t admit it but he does enjoy her company. They grow to have a friendship over the course of the year.

- Kurahashi Hinano (addressed as Hinano or Superior Hina)

They started out as casual friends for a while, but still got along super well. Then summer break began and they found each other to be great bug-catching partners. They have a lot in common, being excitable and chatty. Their conversations never end. Mai is glad there’s a biology nerd besides herself.

- Akabane Karma (addressed as Karma or Satan)

They’re very good friends, and surprisingly clicked fast! They have a lot of similar interests and occasionally, Mai will volunteer to help him in pranks. Karma loves to ruffle/mess up her hair, half out of fondness and half genuine enjoyment at her ire. He calls her “May-chan” in an exaggerated American accent to make fun of her. They can disagree at times but when push comes to shove, they’re there for each other.

-Kayano Kaede (addressed as Kaede, later Akari)

They’re definitely close friends and it’s just so obvious to everyone how much Mai adores her. She’s constantly hugging her, getting her pudding, etc. But more than that, Kayano was someone she could confide in and felt comfortable around. The reveal hits Mai hard, and she needs a while away from her. Once her anger fades, she feels more empathy towards Kayano than anything else. Their friendship repairs and grows stronger afterwards.

__________________

Members of the Kamiya family:

Mother: Professional Choreographer

Mai gets along with her mom and they’re quite close, being each other’s only immediate family. But they don’t have much in common and her mother’s demanding job doesn’t allow them to spend much time together. Mai has grown relying on outside friends more for company.

________________

A hidden side of Mai Kamiya

She loves biology...but anatomy and anything human body-related makes her very squeamish. She especially can’t handle the sight of blood or needles before feeling dizzy.

_______________

Extra notes:

^^ Actually that ties into a lot about her. She has really awful test anxiety, which is how she dropped down to 3-E. She either did poorly in the exams for her worst subjects...or in the final exam of 2nd year, she skipped school to avoid the test all together. That’s how scared she was.

She gets very nauseous and feels sick under a lot of academic pressure, especially in exams.

She’ll never admit this though. No, in every other aspect of her life, she tries her hardest to keep a brave face, look independent and strong and everything she doesn’t feel she truly is.

Before I forget to mention this, she transferred to Kunugigaoka in her second year! She met Sugino since they were in the same class, and he was the first friend she made. 

She has a lot of pride in things she is good at (sports, art) and it can push to the point of arrogance sometimes.

Will take any chance to prove herself, even if it’s reckless or stupid or ruin things. For someone who’s a moodmaker and loves people, she’s not the best team player but that improves over time.

Generally is easygoing and goes with the flow of the mood...but she can have a short temper, and go from 0-100 fast. Only if someone is insulting her or her loved ones though.

She’s pretty confrontational, but don’t be fooled: she’s more bark than bite. She’s a sweetheart deep down, and all her classmates know it.

She’s bubbly, cute, and a total chatterbox once she gets comfortable around people, and can drop her “cool rebel” facade

Very creative and resourceful UwU. Super quick-witted too.

But she also can be incredibly ambitious and has big aspirations for the future. She’s fairly realistic though.

Her biggest flaws are that she can be self-centered, very stubborn, rash, short-tempered, overdramatic, and slightly arrogant. She has little confidence in herself.

Her name “Mai” means “dance” and it was given by her mother, a professional dancer. She wanted to name her daughter after her greatest passion. Even though Mai grows to have absolutely no interest in dance lmfao. She complains about this but stops when she learns of poor Kimura’s plight.

She grew up speaking a lot of English within her family since her mother used to live in America so her language skills are great...but she is far from perfect at literature. She mostly just lacks the patience to analyze it and finds it boring.

And...that’s it UwU. Also just gonna drop this transparent version because I worked really hard on drawing her and I’m proud 💜

[timelordthirteen]

So in further fuck means testing forever ranting, this idea that if you make X, where X kinda sounds like a “really big amount of dollars” is this idea that nothing has changed for anyone making X. This assumes...

the cost of things has not increase (it has, as much as 3.5% in some areas, but overall 1.25% nationally in the US)

there have been no additional things people have needed to buy as a direct result of the pandemic (there are: masks, gloves, medicine, extra of things to keep from having to go out so often, laptops to work from home, etc.)

people making X haven’t also gotten COVID and now potentially have huge ass medical bills or long term complications they are dealing with

We should not be basing what people need NOW on what they needed in 2019, or even 6 months ago in 2020. PAY PEOPLE NOW. Regardless of what they make. Just fucking do it. Sort out whether they should have on the back end with next year’s taxes. I care infinitely more about people who are unemployed, people who are in danger of losing their homes, than I do about whether we gave some “rich” people an extra $2K lmfao it’s only $1400 because reasons.

[henstomper]

Why is it you think dnd sucks? And I promise this isn’t one of those Stupid Discourse Things where I do some fuck shit with your answer

mostly there’s just better games out there, a lot of which even do the same kind of thing as dnd. i dont really have anything against most editions. i really just hate 5e. i think it’s a badly designed, boring game that sacrifices any interesting design decisions, character options, or settings in favor of a really bland & shallow ruleset thats meant to piss off as few people as possible rather than anything else and is made by a company that wants to make a million billion dollars by coasting off being the only rpg anybody knows and doing a bunch of shitty rick and morty stranger things crossovers rather than actually being a good game with fun content.

like, it’s not even about making it easier to play. you can make a game easier to play without also making it really lame and bad like 5e did. pathfinder 2e managed to streamline the hell out of what is essentially an even more bloated and fucked up version of 3.5 and it’s honestly my favorite fantasy rpg mechanically

also fucking everything in it has to be on the fucking sword coast, too. the most boring part of the most boring dnd setting. because hey, doing things outside of Boring Fucking European Fantasy Zone might make some people uncomfortable and not want to buy a book wizards of the coast can’t ever have that. it took 4 fucking years to get a supplement for one of the dnd settings that wasn’t forgotten realms lmfao. it’s the biggest, wealthiest corporation in the rpg industry and all of its money and resources are being dumped into churning out the fantasy equivalent of stale saltine crackers and shitty podcast crossover books nobody wants. if you want anything cool at all in 5e you either have to homebrew it or get 3rd party stuff. like not to dunk on homebrew/3pp but you shouldnt be relying on it to make your game good like wotc does lmao

[tonyglowheart]

.

I wish there were more fandom meta (meta and not salt vents, which is often what my posts get tinged with by the time I post here 8') rip) about the intersection of fandom competing needs and cultural/racial sensitivity or like intersectionality-fueled competing needs here on tumblr. Bc there's a LOT of discussion I'll see on twt, and some of it is borne of discourse sure, but then some good discourse comes out of it on how to treat interfandom issues more intersectionally, and how to be/to try to be more consideration of a source culture especially when you're not a part of either the source culture or the source target audience.

I do still think there's a good chunk of EN audience that is quite Western-centric/Western-gaze/Americentric in their views, and acts like & treats moral values or aesthetic judgments as universal. Yes, even some ppl who aren't espousing purity wank.

Sometimes it's as simple as the way they call names, or some person making a joke about a trope within the media like the spitting blood, or the names. But here's the thing: it does discomfort me to see this kind of casual behavior sometimes bc I do think, as far as cultural sensitivity goes, it's out of place bc they're not your jokes to make. Like in Mean Girls where it was only okay for Janis to make the too gay to function joke. Or how like I can make Asian parent jokes with my fellow diaspora, but if a white person tries to participate I get very uncomfortable. Or okay, I can and will ask other Asians where they're from or what flavor of Asian they are, often with that kind of joking self aware tone of how yes this is how the wypipo Other us, and it's fine, but if some other rando (usually white) off the street asks me where I'm *from*, I'm now born in the good ol USA and I play dumb until they drop it lmfao.

I just... wish there's more convos on intersectional issues and cultural sensitivity and cultural competence and how intl audiences can be polite guests in media-not-their-own here, bc... part of the reason I'm not as much on here now except sometimes when I have a salt-vent too long for twt, is that I feel stiffled and silenced here. I feel like I have to shut up to be considerate to white feelings, because they're prioritizing "traditional fandom etiquette" but to the exclusion of considering issues and competing needs intersectionally. I feel like sometimes I *can't* have certain conversations or feelings without it being offputting to people who are "just here to have fun bc it's fandom" so it becomes "you're policing people/ you're gatekeeping", instead of "hey maybe can we pause and consider an alternate perspective to competing needs, and like maybe some intersectionality." And I think that's part of what's been triggering for me here, the like marginalized identity feeling of "you better shut up or we'll shut you out" triggering that like helpless rage I feel when it comes to the fractures in trying to reconcile my diaspora/"immigrant" identity.

Some of this is like, my own brewing cognitive dissonance on tumblr side-fandom of this burgeoning cmedia fandom sector here, but some of these thoughts came out of the recent growing discussions surrounding fandom and race(racism) too, as well as posts I've seen that had me thinking abt things from different perspectives.

But anyway, I mean it's not all fandom-driven. Tumb itself has made changes that make it harder for me to navigate too and more work to navigate. So I'm not "blaming" tumblr fandom or anything. But just... I get this feeling of having to manage (white) feelings here that I don't tend to get on tumblr, and I feel like from what I've seen of tumblr fandom has been very homogeneous, but towards a "traditional Tumblr-based English-language fandom way," vs Twitter where I feel like I've been able to find a more diverse-feeling base.

And like this is by no means definitive or exhaustive, and I may in fact have missed segments of fandom where there ARE more danmei fans, and I do know several ppl who're tumblr ppl who ARE very publicly making efforts to get to learn the culture more and who are publicly demonstrating how they're trying to be respectful vs just being there to "have fun" and not apparently to really stretch themselves about it. Like I'm very aware this could just be a "me" thing and what part of the tumblr fandom I'm seeing & am generally in.

And I'm also aware that a more "productive" way of handling this would be to turn that frustration into action and work to educate ppl more and engage with ppl to encourage positive explorations into language and culture.

But like... the world is like actively depressing me and has been for months, and I run on like 3.5 energies on a good day and much of that goes to getting thru the work day, and the rest is usually for me to channel out so I can decompress as much as I can to try to get ready for the next day, and like.. I DO have a lot of anger and resentment in me from feeling marginalized and silenced thru my life, as an Asian American, as well as relentlessly pushed to assimilate even though I had to also reconcile that I will likely always be Othered because there'll always be some new random white person who meets me and the first thing they ask is if I speak English. And like on a good day, I maybe don't always have the energy to perform emotional labor to placate white feelings in addition to the emptional labor of educating them. Let alone now when the world has been having consecutive crises for literal years now at this point and all of this has had additional adverse effects on my mental health.

And like at least on twitter, even though the wank cycles are so short and the wank there feels so explosive, at least there ARE people having discussions on, if not necessarily intersectionality per se, then discussions on decolonizing as far as EN fandom towards Asians/Chinese ppl in cmedia fandoms go. Like at least there, I don't feel like I'm drowned in a sea of Anglocentric fandom priorities, and like a good segment of ppl push back against colonizing tendencies from Anglocentric fandom, & I can find my ppl and feel seen and heard without feeling like people are seeing me more as a nuisance intruding on THEIR fun, as if I'M the interloper/outrageous one here.

[oysterie]

I have more issues w once there were wolves the more I think abt it like the middle bit was fun. Uhm spoilers idk bit when you think duncans the one who killed him and inti thinks so too and she goes to him like "dude I thought you were going to arrest him lmfao what did you do?????" So so funny. She finds this abusive husband's body/throat ripped open on the side of the road and is worried that a wolf (that her and her team of scientists are responsible for reintroducing to the area a la yellowstone) killed him or that someone js trying to blame this on them so she buries him and then just hangs out like oopsies idk what happened to the guy. Some guy kills one of her wolves w a trap and she attacks him w a crowbar. She's just hanging out going to knitting circles and learning that the town cop killed his dad when he was a teen (justified). Then the ending of the books happens and it's like teen drama thriller ending that while it's not out of nowhere it just doesn't fit the book at all. Like yeah I saw it building up but I was hoping it was otherwise unlike migrations where you see the ending building and its inevitable and horrible but it works so well mwah. Also why did the traumatized woman who "became a danger to others" have to ride into the woods to die/stay away from everyone I get that she started planning murders and killing ppl but also its still :/ but whateves. Migrations was still so good though I reccomened that so much. 5/5 but uhm wolves is 3.5 I'm too lazy to leave goodreads reviews ever im indecisive. Also stop trying to make me feel sympathy for the cop love interest i get that this is like small town scottish highlands but still -_-- .Sry for only bringing up these two books I've read very little else the last year my bad 😁

[ourlittlebitofnothinguniverse]

Hey for the ask thing, all the questions you're comfortable with answering

oh boy!!! heck yeah fun shit thanks my dude! little did u Kno…… I LOVE oversharing !!! lmao muahahahahaha i’m probably gonna answer all of them thank u for enabling it lmfao

1. Do you ever doubt the existence of others than you?

yah on Rly Bad days

2. On a scale of 1-5, how afraid of the dark are you?

like… 3.5? i like the dark but,,, ‘m Scare,,,,,

3. The person you would never want to meet?

Orange Turnip

4. What is your favorite word?

it changes tbh,, hm but i can’t think of any rn!

5. If you were a type of tree, what would you be?

i’d be….. a nice oak! thicc and full of secrets

6. When you looked in the mirror this morning what was the first thing you thought?

i didn’t lmao reflection what’s that

7. What shirt are you wearing?

i’m wearing the dress i wore to work

8. What do you label yourself as?

annoying or boring lmao but also the Goblin King and that is Good

9. Bright room or dark room?

i still don’t know if this is referring to like paint shade or like the amount of light it gets or like if i sleep in a bright room or dark room so like??? *shrug emoji*

10. What were you doing at midnight last night?

i was?? drawing i think

12. Who told you they loved you last?

i think it was @wrenn-frug​ 💕💖 lov u fren!

13. Your worst enemy?

dunno man probably myself but that sounds cliche so like??? the sun bc it always burns me

14. What is your current desktop picture?

a screenshot from song of the sea!!! lOVE that movie!!!! i’d post it but like?? i don’t think i have it saved anymore or if i do i don’t feel like looking but it’s that one scene where they’re walking thru the pretty field towards the trees and there’s foxes in the corner and she’s playing the shell it’s so pretty,,,,,

15. Do you like someone?

uh yah my cat

16. The last song you listened to?

Young God - Halseygood song lov it,,,,

17. You can press a button that will make any one person explode. Who would you blow up?

oraNGE TURNIP

18. Who would you really like to just punch in the face?

orange turnip my dude i Hate

19. If anyone could be your slave for a day, who would it be and what would they have to do?

uh nobody ????

20. What is your best physical attribute? (showing said attribute is optional)

my squishy thighs and my fantastic stretch marks (which have taken me YEARS to accept)

21. If you were the opposite sex for one day, what would you look like and what would you do?

No

22. Do you have a secret talent? If yes, what is it?

????????????? secret???? talent?????? lemme check, ,, , , *reaches into a bag* nope bitch empt y aint got No Talent lmao

23. What is one unique thing you’re afraid of?

okay so like this is really dumb and i partially answered this in this ask abt the flushing toilets @ night thing but like to elaborate and make it even more dumb not only am i afraid to flush toilets @ night bc it’s just rly creepy and loud to me (esp if i’ve been asleep) but like,, , sort of in the same vein of fear is that when i was little my older sister told me that there was a ghost in the toilet and if i don’t flush it’ll get me and like i kno it’s not tru but like,,,,,, Sometimes,,,,,, (i must clarify i’m not scared of toilets themselves but like flushing freaks me out sometimes like @ night or if i don’t flush fast enough lmao don’t look @ me i’m a mess)

24. You can only have one kind of sandwich. Every sandwich ingredient known to humankind is at your disposal.

Excuse? is this like that i can ONLY eat this sandwich or is it that this is the only sandwich i can ever eat or like i can only ever have one last sandwich bc honestly i’m Not Okay with any of those scenarios no matter how many ingredients i get for the initial creation

25. You just found $100! How are you going to spend it?

Dream daddy dating simulator lmao uh?? also probably more food for archie bc he is Expensive

26. You just got a free plane ticket to anywhere in the world, but you have to leave immediately. Where are you going to go?

Ireland probably. always wanted to see ireland

27. An angel appears out of Heaven and offers you a lifetime supply of the alcoholic beverage of your choice. “Be brand-specific” it says. Man! What are you gonna say about that? Even if you don’t drink booze there’s something you can figure out… so what’s it gonna be?

“Even if you don’t drink booze there’s something you can figure out” like???? no???? if u don’t drink alcohol why would u want a lifetime supply??? unless i could like…. sell it??? whats the Most Expensive kind i’ll just get an unending supply of heavenly Expensive Alcohol to sell for incredibly inflated prices to the rich bc it’s From Heaven and give the money to the poor bc like,,, why not

28. You discover a beautiful island upon which you may build your own society. You make the rules. What is the first rule you put into place?

bitches gotta keep they damn opinions to themselves if they can’t respect somebody’s life based on factors they can’t help (race, religion, orientation, gender etc) also no money like We Don’t Need It i’m so tired of Needing money

29. What is your favorite expletive?

Fuck bc u can use it in So Many situations

30. Your house is on fire, holy shit! You have just enough time to run in there and grab ONE inanimate object. Don’t worry, your loved ones and pets have already made it out safely. So what’s the one thing you’re going to save from that blazing inferno?

o shit probably the twenty dollar metallic watercolors i got bc shit son??? actually probably like my laptop or smth idk

31. You can erase any horrible experience from your past. What will it be?

my childhood thx

32. You got kicked out of the country for being a time-traveling heathen who sleeps with celebrities and has super-powers. But check out this cool shit… you can move to anywhere else in the world!

this is.. not a questionalthough it is a wonderful scenario

33. The Celestial Gates Of Beyond have opened, much to your surprise because you didn’t think such a thing existed. Death appears. As it turns out, Death is actually a pretty cool entity, and happens to be in a fantastic mood. Death offers to return the friend/family-member/person/etc. of your choice to the living world. Who will you bring back?

none of them bc if the celestial gates of the beyond is real then all the people i’d want to bring back are probably in a Better Place or something and why would i want to drag them to Hell?

34. What was your last dream about?

Cannot remember to save my life altho i kno it was rly weird and convoluted

35. Are you a good….[insert anything you’d like here]?

u did not put anything Here so i will Ignore

36. Have you ever been admitted to the hospital?

Nope

37. Have you ever built a snowman?

yAH it’s fun!

38. What is the color of your socks?

not wearing any

39. What type of music do you like?

A Lot

40. Do you prefer sunrises or sunsets?

Sunsets,,, evening is so nice mm m

41. What is your favorite milkshake flavor?

chocolate ayyyy

43. Do you have any scars?

a couple but like for Dumb Reasons

44. What do you want to be when you graduate?

I’ve graduated hs but i wanna be an animator when i decide which college to go to

45. If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?

my brain pls bartender can i have a Healthy One (correction to favorite word #4: fav word currently is deign)

46. Are you reliable?

i would like to think so

47. If you could ask your future self one question, what would it be?

are you happy?

48. Do you hold grudges?

YAH but only if i’ve been Pushed Too Far which is Pretty Damn Far by most ppls standards

49. If you could breed two animals together to defy the laws of nature, what new animal would you create?

none I am Not a God

50. What is the most unusual conversation you’ve ever had?

i have had So Many???? the most recent one was two times in a row random ppl i barely knew asked me for my netflix account bc they didnt have one and like…. bro what who R U,,,,, (i had literally only talked to the first guy once for ten minutes on fb)

51. Are you a good liar?

is the sky green? don’t think so

52. How long could you go without talking?

Very Long but like Only on Bad Weeks

53. What has been you worst haircut/style?

None my hair is Magnificent (idk)

54. Have you ever baked your own cake?

like birthday cake? never but i lov to bake cakes so like i bake myself cakes all the time

55. Can you do any accents other than your own?

i am so bad @ accents i can’t even Read in my Head in accents even though i know what the accent Should Sound Like

56. What do you like on your toast?

peanut butter and banan slices

57. What is the last thing you drew a picture of?

working on a picture of a tiger redraw

58. What would be you dream car?

a Bike bc i Do Not Like cars

59. Do you sing in the shower? Or do anything unusual in the shower? Explain.

i only sing in the shower when nobody is home (which is infrequent bc my mom is Always here) bc i am self conscious around most ppl but like Music,,,,, also when i was little i would pretend that i was standing in the rain all sad like in movies lmao

60. Do you believe in aliens?

yah

61. Do you often read your horoscope?

i follow an astrology blog and i read homestuck i mean,,

62. What is your favorite letter of the alphabet?

i??? A maybe bc there are a lot of ways to write it pretty idk but like specifically capital A ig

63. Which is cooler: dinosaurs or dragons?

Dragons they’re fire-breathing friends and i love them

64. What do you think about babies?

Gross

65. Freebie! Ask anything interesting you can think of.

U Didn’t put anything Here either so like how abt i give u a random fact abt myself that seems good my favorite bird is the lammergeier bc they’re basically irl dragons and they’re so pretty??? love them??? also i hate monkeys and apes esp chimpanzes bc they are scary and too much like humans to me i don’t like them

BOY that took way longer than i thought bc i had to feed my cat halfway thru and everything and like this is a Long Post sorry guys but ayyyyy this was fun thanks ari

[men4ce-red]

i saw only a few draws of yanya but i want to know more about him :

kicks the door in WELL my friend ur in LUCK bc i have a LOT of shit abt yanya to talk abt

let’s kick it off with his backstory SHALL WE

so ! yanyas a lil kitsune boi raised in a little village in the outskirts of karnosea on famia, we dont have a name for it yet its not important w/e ANYWAY

he was BORN in a bigger town in central karnosea which i also dont have a name for but its also not important, what IS important is that he was a happy lil gremlin for most of his little babby years until he hit about elementary school where all the other kids’ parents started teaching them to be racist towards orcs and kitsunes and lizardfolk n shit! so they started being little shits towards him. which made him not like being in fox shape around them anymore. or in general.

so when his mums, shiranuit, a kitsune barbarian, and resnerina, a half-orc witch, were like “fuck that shit,” they moved away to that much smaller settlement, made up almost Entirely of rarer races like catfolk and wyvaran, and also orcs and ogres and stuff yea

and things were p alright! yanyas mums love him Very Much ok i love them and i love him and they all love each other. shiranuit works as a weaponsmith, and resnerina works as a luthier. so when u mashed their work together, u got yanya, a skald, or Basically a rage bard, who makes all his weapons and instruments, bc he makes his weapons into instruments, and vice versa.

his first weapon in game was a heavy mace that doubled as a guitar! it was crafted from metal ofc but its body was in the shape of a cow skull bc that shit’s metal. on one side was the guitar all strung up, and on the other he’d flip it around and it’s just Covered in spikes for him to beat the shit out of whatever 8)c

he uses his music to express himself. even with cure and mending magic, destroying things and lashing out and being aggressive all the time doesn’t make him feel good, so he’ll usually just turn to screaming out some sick tunes instead. his music’s very important to him.

moving back to early life however! he moved on through school pretty easy. i mean. not Entirely too easily bc the boy’s dumb as a brick so w/e he just. he didnt flunk out at the very least ok Cs get degrees anyway

and when he was abt.. 16, 17, he met ash!  his first..and Only girly friend who’s also a kitsune, and a gunslinger! between the two of them, she’s kind of.. the ‘brains’ but. even then she’s not like, super smart. it’s just.. not hard to be smarter than yanya w/ that sweet 7 WIS and 10 INT score lmfao. she’s plenty clever tho!

around this time yanya and ash didn’t go to school, they travelled around their local part of karnosea causing a little trouble here and there bc well. they’re of chaotic alignment. however! chaotic good alignment, so they really only gave hell to..racists 8) .. bc fuck em

the thing is though, while yanya had two mums that loved him a lot, ash didn’t. she had one mum that sucked a bunch and constantly berated her, and yanya knew, it was partially why they spent so much time just carting around wildly, having fun, bc yanya knew she deserved better!

as a side note, karnosea is neighboring artorias, which is the Big Capital of famia, where Queen Azaroa has opened a bard college! probably the best and most chattered abt all over the world tbh. you can bet yanya’s heard of it by now, being as musically inclined as he is, and has always sort of dreamed of going there.. but shit, he and his fam ain’t making that kind of money, lmfao

but! it just so happens, as rumors say, there’s a new scholarship surfacing, offered specifically to members of more. rare races, such as kitsunes! yanya can’t lie about his interest being piqued..

but the thing was, from 16 going on 18, he was sort of perfectly happy and content just travelling around like a rascal with ash, because they were best friends!! and having fun!! and without yanya, he thought ash would be all alone with her fuckin mean ass mum!! he didn’t want that, and also that bard college is probably overrated anyway, whatever..

ash’s mum isn’t having any of it, wtf ash is happy??  

the second ash and yanya get back home from whatever little bout of travel they were on, ash’s mum goes on a tirade at ash about how she’s dragging yanya down and holding him back, how she’s not good enough for him, etc.. so ash panics, because she knows he isn’t going to leave her unless she makes him never wanna see her again.

so! that same day, ash tells yanya about. how she’s been cheating on him the whole time. laughs in his face. tells him he should’ve expected it, kitsunes are known for being tricksters, liars after all!

he’s heartbroken.. so he leaves for artorias in a shocked daze probably not a full 12 hr later 

and he gets accepted to the college!

ofc being kinda poor and rough around the edges, it’s not without it’s fair share of. snooty ass rich kids being assholes, which is whatever. turns out tho, some of those rich kids are from karnosea! so because yanyas as subtle as an airhorn, rumors about him not being human spread. guess who gets to deal with racist school peers all over again! yaaaay

it’s not totally bleak, though. at college yanya met jonavahn, neyla, pazzoch, and a bunch of the other rare-race scholarship kids and they all form their own little nestled group of friends :’>

soo because yanya’s fuckin shit at like, learning, he like, does kind of piss poor in all the actual study-centric classes lmfao. but! he’s fantastic at the physical side of things–he excels with playing instruments and melee fighting, because it’s less read-a-book-and-study and more muscle memory and physical training and practice, ofc. he just barely graduated bc getting half amazing grades and half shitty grades only balances out to so much, but dAMMIT HE DID IT

so when he graduates, he goes back home for a little bit. im sure while he was at college, he managed to visit his mums back at karnosea for a little bit on breaks, but. just the idea of going back to karnosea, just knowing that. it’s where ash was. it made it a lot harder in practice than it was in theory for him lmfao.

but being back home, getting to see him mums again! it makes him really happy! because his mums love him a lot !!! and love and support him a shit ton!! they’re so proud! look at their son that graduated from the artorian queen’s bard college! holy shit!!

yanya realizes sometimes that he takes his mums for granted.. they’ve always been there to makes him feel like everything’s ok. and they do a damn good job of it! 

 a fun fact! lershe, my old incompetence quest 1 character, is a half-orc monk–by the end of iq1, he became a lycanthrope (this was in dnd 3.5, so monks could still get infected by lycanthropy), and also a lvl 30 minor deity lmfao

lershe was separated from his dad, who was raising him on his own, at a v young age. at the end of iq1, lershe sought him out, found him again, and found out that he’d started a new family with a new wife! and tbh lershe met his mum in iq1 he could not be happier for his dad lmfao. but they have a daughter! so lershe has a little half-sister! and that little half-sister is resnerina!

because lycanthropes and kitsunes share a sort of similar ability in changing shape ya kno yeah, when yanya was a little kid, lershe was still “alive” as a mortal half-orc (lershe put off accepting that he was an immortal deity for a long time) and. was a big inspiration for yanya, naturally. these kids and people were giving him shit for being able to change shape into something that resembled an animal, but his uncle lershe can do it to, and HE’S a god!! so whatever!!

anyway so iq2 started off by all the characters running into each other in a little town in karnosea and some shit abt a cave off the outskirts of town getting ransacked by mercenaries or smth, idr

a little before then our DM said txeru and yanya were going to enter town together, and aria and karrina were going to enter town together, and we could come up w/ whatever reason why they’d end up together so txeru and yanya met first actually, just outside on town in a little tavern where they. probably got into a little scuffle just bc bar fights are fun. who cares. its fine. 

its ironic bc right now, in game, txeru and yanya are fucking pissed at each other! and its great. the drama is clearing my skin. my crops are prospering. 

basically txeru is a kasatha, an alien race not native to famia, and he’s come to famia trying to hide from two .. sort of alien police that’re after him for all the petty crimes he’s done. thing is, these two Very Specific alien cops are after him because. he kinda. was romantically involved with Both of them, one being his partner in crime and the other being of kasathan royalty–when he was backed into a corner and about to get caught he kind of ditched his partner and left the noble out high and dry so they’re both PISSED at him

they recently made their way to famia and found txeru, and after we TURNED TAIL AND RAN THE FUCK OFF from them, txeru explained his story

having his heart fucking shattered by ash, yanya kinda wasn’t super happy to find out txeru was a heart-shattering asshole himself! 

so he DECKED HIM IN THE FACE and hadn’t spoken a kind word to him in like, a week

NOW they’re talking, it’s just. every word they say to each other is some variant of “fuck you” and atm we’re waiting for a boiling point to hit to see if they’ll kiss and make up or if they’re just gonna have to hate each other! 8) im so excited

meanwhile this entire time, we’re level 10 right now. so half way to the capstone level 20. 

yanya still hasn’t formally revealed that he’s a kitsune to anyone in the group. but! as i said. the boy’s subtle as a brick thrown through a window. he’s slipped up enough times in his human disguise for just about everyone in the party to catch just a little something being off about him, but since most of the party is from artorias, away from the rarer races of karnosea, not everyone knows what a kitsune is

BUT we HAVE met a kitsune in game! madame fouxy (blame my dm for that name), but even then she only shifted from an actual fox shape to anthro fox shape, not to human shape. so they’re still unaware that kitsunes can even do that atm, meaning yanya’s ruse is hanging on by a thread lmfao

he’d just come out and say it bc he’s well aware everyone’s probably seen through him by now, but. it’s suppose to be a secret. knowing that everyone knows doesn’t make him wanna tell it, it makes him wanna convince everyone they’re wrong, even though they’re right, and he doesn’t like lying ,and if everyone’s already figured it out already, then he’s not doing a good job at keeping his own damn secrets, which freaks him out, and… etc

yanya’s favorite colors are red and blue, his favorite food is smoked rabbit, he’s 6′2″ flat on his heels in human shape, but he’s wearing stilettos bc he’s use to toe walking in fox-shape, which usually puts him up to about 6′4″, 6′5″..

he’s got a shit ton of muscle, and he eats a lot to keep up his energy! so he has his fair share of fat w a soft belly. he weighs probably anywhere from 250-300 bc im not good w weights lmfao

he has a total of.. 14 piercings, four on each ear, one on each eyebrow, two on his lips, one on his nose, and one on his tongue, almost all of which he got at the bard college lmfaoo

atm at level 10, he has 5 tails! only one spell-like ability from them, however, which is disguise self. 

he knows how to sew!

he has a fear of mirrors and heights.

it’s less a ‘fear’ and more. he doesn’t like looking at himself in the mirror, practically can’t stand it when he’s in human shape. seeing his human face all he can think is “liar, liar, liar” because that’s not his ‘real’ face. seeing his fox face he’s only reminded how much fewer people would rather see him this way. if he has to, he’ll much prefer looking at his fox face, however.

AND I THINK..THAT MAY JUST COVER IT..if it’s not everything it’s Pretty close, and if i come up w anything new ur probably gonna see me draw it at some point LMFAO